Follow your Path

It is funny how the feeling of having completely lost your own path of life can bring you right back onto it.
As i wrote yesterday, i work on a new track that suddenly happen to me while just playing around with some instruments. What i did not mention yesterday was the fact that i really had a bad day that day. I spare you the details of what got me down, but what i find most interesting is the fact that when the feeling of being lost, the feeling of “What the fuck am i doing with my life here?”, the feeling of drifting through the days without direction, arises, it draws me right back into my emotional world, right back into my creativity and right off the way that society demands from me onto my own path of life.
And that ultimately leads to the question, if i feel so sheltered on that path, why don’t i stay on it for the rest of my life, give it the purpose i always wanted it to have? I tell you why: Money! My path does not pay my bills, does not feed me with any other than feelings of fulfillment. And so it’s always like a slap in your face when another of “real life”‘s demands is knocking on your door.
I had a blast, yesterday and part of today, because now i am finished with the composing work of my new track. And how else could i name it than Path. It has all the desperation, the longing and the depression in it that i went through yesterday. I am not sure if there will be vocals or if i let it be fully instrumental. it can also come to the point where i want to have speech in it. As i said, i a not sure yet. I guess I’ll decide it after i have written something.
It feels good to listen to it and to dive right back into the mood, although the real world is knocking on the door again. I am tempted not to answer.

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